full speed, and crashed

a day after the i made e fateful decision,
went to work without much rest.
and a head full of problems

so i crashed.
ended up with just a fractured hand in 6 places.
should have been more
sigh

the memory flashes i had not too long ago,
it became reality on thursday

somehow i wasnt sorry tt i fell.
in fact sumwhere inside me, i felt a sense of satisfaction.
but then again, what abt my parents, friends, and her.?

ahm given 2 months medical leave
so out of ideas.

fuck it

i dont know why i feel like blogging today.
been so ashamed of myself.

crying myself to sleep.
finally let her go
it wasnt easy
if its meant to be, then it is
still praying for her to come back.
hope ure happy at the moment ,
tts all u think about now.
living life as it is now

i am scared.
when i came back into your life, the enthusiasm died off after a while, citing u had him as a priority
verbal promises dont count shit

when i'm gone, you lament about missing my company and me not being there for ya

what the fuck.?

if i am really gone, take care of yourself.

will still be waiting tho.
in vain, no?

back again

sorry for the silence.
finally i moved house.
tt explains everything.
being tired, internet connection not up yet, and a whole lot of other things.

anyway my new house, is just a few blks away frm the old one.
but a tad bigger.
have my own room.
so, pls do come over on hari raya or sumthing
:D

work has been quite slack.
just computer based learning throughout.

lenny is fine.
still waiting tho.
sheesh, now my cousins are asking abt her.
all those married ones,
grr... what am i suppose to say to them.?

lots of frens are getting engaged
some are getting married even.
*shrugs.

take it as it goes.
contemplating on signing on with the army.
but for 5 years only.
just to be stable financially maybe
but i'm gonna give it some serious thought.
for now, i'm gonna retake my o level malay
aiming for a distinction.
so tt i can get into NIE
insyaAllah

later